All These Things I've Done

Today I had my "working interview" with the Oral Surgery site. I think that it went really well. I was there for 4 1/2 hours. I watched one surgery, then the Dr asked me to come in and assist him on the rest. I did my best. I hope that the two Dr's there saw that I was more than willing to help out. That I am not shy. That I try. That I am social, and try to get to know the people that work there. I can only hope. I would love this job. This is what I want to be doing the rest of my life. I want to graduate from Dental School, and start on an Oral Surgery rotation. I would love it. I can not even begin to describe how badly I want this job!

I also have had interviews for other jobs. A floor sweeper at the hospital. A Pharmacy Tech also at the hospital. A representative at a call center. A dispatcher for a trucking company. And several positions at the Mall.

I have more applications to turn in, and even more places to follow-up with. I am determined. I will get a job. I know it.

Feel Good Drag

I think that things are starting to settle in now. I have spent nearly every waking hour of everyday trying to find a job. Filling out applications. Giving away resumes. Scheduling interviews. Having interviews. Following-up. I am starting to get tired. And I am starting to get a little discouraged, and a little depressed.

I have successfully scored a part-time job with Journeys at the mall. The pay is minimum wage, and I may get up to 10 hours a week. I am happy that I do have something. But realistically I need more. I need more work. More pay.

I have had quite a few very good interviews. Two more at the hospital. Neither of which are doing what I would want to do...but I am not picky. One with a trucking company. Quite a few at the mall. And one that I am really hoping for, an Assistant at an Oral Surgery center. I actually go back for a "working interview" with them tomorrow. I am very excited about it. I will have the chance to show them that I am a very hard worker. And that I do know what I am doing. And that I would be a very good asset to the team.

With all that success that I have had, I still do feel a little discouraged. I think the seriousness of the situation has been sitting on top of me rather hard. I need a job. I need a good paying job. I am trying to stay hopeful, and stay positive. But I am finding that to be hard right now.

I still feel really good about being here in Mankato. I love it here. I do. I want desperately for things to work out. I know that if they don't that my family and friends would readily accept me back in Utah. I am very grateful for that. I still feel that I need this. That I need to be here. I feel as if I have some lesson to learn or something. I am trusting my feelings. I am putting faith in them. I hope that it pays off.

I am not sure why I am starting to be discouraged and depressed. I think that I have had quite a bit of success for the amount of time that I have been searching. I think that I am missing interaction with people. Real interaction...not just during an interview. I have been trying to make friends at Journeys. I just still feel as if there is a big hole missing in me.

But I can't let it get to me. I need to stay focused. I need to stay positive, and not begin to doubt. Right now though, I am finding that to be much harder than it has been in the past.

Get It Faster

I made this video on Sunday. Haylee and I have been enjoying our time together. We missed Morgan. She makes the "family play time" complete.


Enjoy!

Zapatista, Don't Give Up

Once again I am job searching. It seems like I am a professional at this. I go in to stores/businesses/clinics/restaurants/etc... ask for a resume, fill it out, and schmooze the manager. Then two days later I follow-up with that manager, and hope for the best. I really hate it.

I was so happy when I first got the job at ISJ. One of the first thoughts that went through my head, was that I would not have to really search for a job again for a long time. I was wrong.

In the past three days I think that I have filled out over 30 applications. So so many. With even more to be filed out. Tomorrow I am dedicating another full day to the cause.

I have one interview set up for next week. My goal for tomorrow is to have 3 more. That is very achievable. Wish me luck!

Morgan has been gone for two days already. They have gone by quick. I do miss her. I always do miss her when we are apart. I love her more than words can describe. But this time that she has been gone has been different than past instances. Usually I miss her terribly. Even when I am very preoccupied with things. The thought of us being apart is so strong always in my mind. It makes being apart rather difficult for me. But this time I have been really at peace with the situation. I have this feeling--that everything is okay, and fine--. I am loving it. It has made these past few days very good. Especially considering I am not really doing anything. I mean, I am out applying for a job, and filling out applications. But I could just sit around and complain over my current situation. I think that this feeling has been a very good blessing.

I am very hopeful that I will be able to find a job here. I do like Minnesota. I am becoming used to the humidity. And somewhat used to the stupid mosquito's. I want to start a new life for myself here. There has to be a reason why God had me come here in the first place. And I am determined to find out what that was.

You Can't Always Get What You Want

I saw her today at a reception
A glass of wine in her hand
I knew she would meet her connection
At her feet was her footloose man

No, you can't always get what you want
You can't always get what you want
You can't always get what you want
And if you try sometime you find
You get what you need

I saw her today at the reception
A glass of wine in her hand
I knew she was gonna meet her connection
At her feet was her footloose man

You can't always get what you want
You can't always get what you want
You can't always get what you want
But if you try sometimes you might find
You get what you need

Oh yeah, hey hey hey, oh...

And I went down to the demonstration
To get my fair share of abuse
Singing, "We're gonna vent our frustration
If we don't we're gonna blow a 50-amp fuse"
Sing it to me now...

You can't always get what you want
You can't always get what you want
You can't always get what you want
But if you try sometimes well you just might find
You get what you need
Oh baby, yeah, yeah!

I went down to the Chelsea drugstore
To get your prescription filled
I was standing in line with Mr. Jimmy
And man, did he look pretty ill
We decided that we would have a soda
My favorite flavor, cherry red
I sung my song to Mr. Jimmy
Yeah, and he said one word to me, and that was "dead"
I said to him

You can't always get what you want, no!
You can't always get what you want (tell ya baby)
You can't always get what you want (no)
But if you try sometimes you just might find
You get what you need
Oh yes! Woo!

You get what you need--yeah, oh baby!
Oh yeah!

I saw her today at the reception
In her glass was a bleeding man
She was practiced at the art of deception
Well I could tell by her blood-stained hands

You can't always get what you want
You can't always get what you want
You can't always get what you want
But if you try sometimes you just might find
You just might find
You get what you need

You can't always get what you want (no, no baby)
You can't always get what you want
You can't always get what you want
But if you try sometimes you just might find
You just might find
You get what you need, ah yes...

Another Bag Of Bricks

Well, I had my meeting today. I had lots of questions answered, but that was about it. I am officially jobless. Again.

I was very frustrated but kept my cool. I gave many scenarios, but it didn't seem to matter. I moved across the country for a job that I no longer have. And I will be honest, my faith is a little wavering right now. I just do not understand.

Oh well, I guess I will just do what I do best...bounce back and start over. Thanks to all of you for your prayers and kind thoughts. I am sure good things will come.

Don't Stop Believing

I can't sleep. It's 2:13 am, and I am tired. I have taken some Tylenol PM, but they don't seem to have kicked in just yet. Morgan and Haylee have been a sleep for hours already, but I just kept tossing and turning. So, now I am up. Rather than fighting a problem that should have gone away on it's own...I am embracing it, and making good use of my time. I suppose anyways.

My mind just won't shut off. Thoughts keep running through it. And no matter how I try to dissect them, they just keep coming up.

I moved out to Minnesota to take a job with Immanuel St. Joseph's Hospital in Mankato as a Surgical Tech. The day after Morgan and I pulled into town I went to the Hospital to have my final pre-employment evaluation. I was told that because of my many surgeries that they would need to see if I would need any accommodations in order for me to preform my duties as a Surg. Tech. I told the nurse practitioner that I was seeing that I have never had any problems before in the past, and do not for see any in the future. She told me that someone in Human Resources would get back to me. So I waited. I called HR, and was told that I would need to wait possibly a week for a decision to be made in my behalf.

I waited. I kept believing. I would not even let the thought enter my mind that I might not actually have the job that I left Utah for. Then on Thursday of last week I finally heard back from the hospital. I was told that according the the nurse practitioner that I saw, I would not be able to preform the job without serious modifications. And that the hospital would not be able to make those modifications for me.

Just like that my worst fear was realized. They were revoking my job from me. I was graceful on the phone. But asked what I could do. I was told that my best bet would be to try to get in contact with my (would be) supervisor and try to work something out. I set to work immediately. I would not lose this job. I tried calling, but never reached either supervisor. So I sent an email to them. Never heard back. The next day I decided to just wait at the hospital until I was able to speak with them.

I arrived at Same Day Surgery around 11:00 am. I asked the nurse at the desk to speak with my supervisor. Said that it was me, and just would like a few minutes time. She went and relayed my message. She came back a few minutes later, and said that my supervisor was in a meeting that would last most of the day and wondered if she could just pass along my message. I told her that I would just make myself comfortable, and wait for my supervisor. An hour and a half later the same nurse came up to me, and told me that my supervisor told me to try to schedule a meeting with her and someone from Human Resources for Monday, and we would be able to talk then. I said thank you, and left.

I took this as a little victory on my end. They weren't just trying to avoid me. They were willing to meet with me, and discuss this situation.

I tried several times to reach the Human Resources lady, but without any success. I left a message describing what my supervisor had requested. And now I am waiting.

This is why I haven't been able to sleep. This is why I am still wide awake and writing this story. In a few hours I hope to hear from Human Resources with a time that I will be able to have my meeting. Maybe I am being a little dramatic, but it seems that my future is hanging on the outcome of this meeting. I can only hope that good will come from it. That I will be able to show them that I do not need the modifications that the nurse practitioner wrote up for me. And that I can preform the job perfectly as I am. Believing that it will allow me to be able to walk out of the meeting with my job back. Believing. Hoping. Wishing. Praying.

Homebrew

It's done! It took a few days. . .But I finished. I decided to make the scarf for Haylee instead of for me. She doesn't seem to like it much, but I am sure she will appreciate it when winter comes. Haha! Here are some pictures. I think that I will try again to make a Josh scarf. With better luck I hope though.

Waggy

Morgan and I are crocheting scarves now. Yep. We are bored. But making the time pass. It's actually kinda fun. Morgan's is much better than mine. But...still long ways to go.

I Am The Highway

Ugh... That was a long drive. So Morgan and I met up in Park City on Monday and left at about 11:30 am. We stopped in Omaha to stay the night with my Aunt Cheri. We got there at about 3:30 am. The next morning we left Omaha again around 11:30 am, and after many long hours we arrived in Mankato at 4:30 pm. It was fun. But long.

Here are some pictures from the drive.

A Fond Farewell

Yesterday I left Utah. I left my family. I left my friends. I left my home. I left my truck. I left all that I knew behind me.

Today I arrived in Mankato Minnesota. Today I came to my new home. Today, I am starting life all over again.

I was very sad to leave my family. I love them very much. They are wonderful people. My parents have always been very supportive of me. And I am very grateful for that. My brothers have been my best friends all of my life. Seth and I have been very close. We have basically done everything together. He has been a great strength to me. I will miss him. Derek and I are probably more similar in life than we would admit. We are both very stubborn. We are both very strong. And this had let to many fun adventures. He is very fun to be around. I will miss him. Garrett is my youngest brother. Garrett and I have had each other our whole lives. It seems that I have always been able to talk to Garrett about whatever, and know that he has an impartial view for me. And vice versa. I will miss our conversations. And our jam sessions. And life with the Killo-G. Then there is Marissa. She is great. I will miss being able to make fun of her. She is a very caring woman. Seth is lucky to have her in his life. I will miss them individually, and I will miss them collectively.

I was able to say good-bye to some of my friends while I was in town. But there were some that I was not able to. I am very lucky to have the friends that I do. They have always been there for me. I will miss them.

The thing that I have learned about life, is that it always goes on. No matter what happens. Good or bad. And everything in between. That is my attitude right now. I have just left everything that I know behind me, to start over in Minnesota. But I know that it will all be there to welcome to back whenever I want it to. Life goes on.

For Miles

Good-bye Cedar City. You have been real. You have been. . . good. It's all over now.

I left Cedar City last night around 10:30 pm. It had been a very, very long day. I finally made it into Springville at my parents house around 2:30 am. I was very tired. But safe.

My last day in Cedar was less than happy. After I had my truck fully loaded, and was getting ready to take off, a repo man came and took my truck. I had been very good about keeping up on my payments with America First. But I had been late on a personal loan, and a credit card. And they decided to take my truck as collateral. There was nothing I could do. Unless I had $6,500.00 just laying around. . . And who has that? So I quickly unloaded the stuff in my truck. And Unhooked the trailer. Then with the help of my Dad, got a 17-foot U-Haul truck. Only problem was that I needed to take the U-Haul trailer to Enterprise (45 miles west), unload the trailer and load the truck without any way to get there. Thankfully my neighbor was able to help me get the trailer to Enterprise. Then finally, 5 hours after first arriving in Enterprise, I left with the truck all loaded.

I was tired. I was sore. I was hungry. And about to pass out from heat exhaustion. But I made it back.

Good-bye Cedar City. Thank you for the memories.